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I was young here once

When the bannister was broken

And the kitchen floor. was sticky

And the sofa ripped and tatty

And the cat pee on the curtain

I was young here once

When the fire smelled of woodsmoke

And the children played with Lego

And the bath was avocado

Full of bubbles, boys, bravado

I was young here once

Double buggy, in the hallway

Bags of shopping in the doorway

Baking fruitcake, making pasta

I was young here once.

I can feel me, in the hallway

I can touch me in the doorway

I can hear my steps, my laughter

I can touch the past, and after

 


I am old here now

Now I’m old. I’m still here, sitting

And these days I do some knitting

And I read.  And I remember.

I am old here now

And the bannister is perfect

And the kitchen floor is stripped

And the sofa cappuccino.

There’s no cat pee on the curtain

I am old here now

Gas flame fire. Smells of nothing

All the shopping is delivered

Baking cake for no one, really.

I am old here now.

And the landline never rings

My mobile barely pings

All the voices in my head

I’m so old here, now.

This, my home, has kept me cradled

This,my home, is full of good

This, my home, now wraps around me

It’s as though it’s understood

That I’m old here, now.

 

Jenny Knight 2022

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